We were talking about the “balance” between two opposing ideas in college, and my instructor said it would be better if we use the word “tension”. There will always be something pulling for more. That concept has helped me through a lot of different situations.

There is never really a perfect work/life balance, but you can find a livable place between the tension of work and home life. Home needs 150% and works wants 150%. You’re one person, so you can only do as well as you can by both, but not 300%. I have to set limits: I will teach one class and each kid gets one extra curricular. If I sign up for too much, it gets to be too much. Also, it’s good to accept help even when it’s not up to your expectations. On days Tim gets the kids off to school, I accept it won’t look like how I get the kids off to school.

It’s not a perfect system, but once you accept that there will always be someone disappointed that you aren’t fulfilling all their needs, life will get easier. It’s important to have an achievable lifestyle rather than higher expectations that aren’t sustainable. Admiration is not worth the price of burnout.