(If anyone quotes you this book in regard to sex and marriage, please do yourself a favor and read the whole thing first before taking any further action. Paul clearly states that he is telling his opinion in response to a question that the reader posed in some earlier correspondence. Since Paul doesn’t restate the original comment, we are all guessing at best. From the context clues it sounds like it was a question from a young guy asking if it’s okay to sleep with his girlfriend.)
This chapter starts with Paul saying it’s good for a man not to have sex with a woman. That sentence by itself could be a condemnation of heterosexual relationships. Paul tells to the reader that he’s happily single, but if one must, each man and woman can have one wife or husband to keep them from sin. They should be together if they are together; he talks about not depriving each other of intimacy unless it is for devotion and prayer. The emphasis here is on caring for your partner and considering their needs, not demanding or coercing another.
Paul again emphasizes that this is his opinion based on his experience. “I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another.” 1 Corinthians 7:7 There is such a current cultural pressure, especially in American churches, for men and women to marry young and have lots of kids, but Paul is honoring those who have different gifts. He encourages widows not to rush to remarry, but stay single and devoted to ministry. He says widows may choose to remarry so as not to “burn with passion.” We have options, people. Don’t force your deal on someone else.
Next, he talks about divorced people staying celibate or reconciling. This statement acknowledges that breakups happen. Unfortunately the pro-marriage emphasis has often ignored or marginalized the secondary-single population too. Paul doesn’t add shame. Paul also doesn’t require believers married to nonbelievers to leave them, especially if they have kids together. It’s important to acknowledge and honor people’s path of faith or non-faith, we cannot force belief, but continue to love each other and respect each other. If the unbelieving spouse wants to leave, he says to let them. He says we are not to be enslaved, but called to peace.
He warns the reader of anxiety of being married and again encourages singleness, reiterating that is his experience and opinion.
